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Wednesday, June 10, 2020

The world as we know it now!

With the lift of the COVID 19 #lockdown in Nigeria, we have seen and heard of so much evil, it is scary. The increasing number of rape cases has made it necessary for us as a people to ensure we teach our children the right things. Parents need to educate both the boy child and female child- Teach the female child to stay safe always and teach the male child to protect the girl always!

A friend was lamenting the other day about how things generally die down after a while here in Nigeria, and I told her its because we have a very short attention span for things. In a bid to have the "happening gist" we tend to move on too quickly to the next big news without concluding serious prevailing issues at hand. Much too quickly, we move on, forgetting that nothing has been done about it, and that nothing will be done about it till it rears its ugly head again. 

The month of June seemed to be a whisper of a promise, a glimmer of hope to many, but so far, all we have heard in Lagos where I live is one case of bad news after another, particularly concerning rape cases. It started with the #JusticeforTina movemnet. No, she wasn't raped, well, not physically. Her life was raped and cut shot by the very people who swore to protect the Nigerian citizenry- our Police. A trigger-happy policeman shot her for no apparent reason. A girl full of promise, the apple of her parents eye. Her life was just snuffed out like a candle, just because the policeman failed to exercise caution. 
Then we woke up a few days after, barely a week, to hear about Uwaila Vera who was brutally raped when she was studying at a church close to her home. She was in her first year in University and had the habit of going to read at the Church to avoid distractions even though school was temporary closed due to the prevailing COVID19 pandemic.  She however didn't die immediately, she died a few days after at the hospital. The #JusticeforUwa hadn't even "caused a stir" yet when we heard of another case in Jigawa state. A little girl of 12 was raped by 11 men. How sad can it get? A little girl is supposed to enjoy her innocence, yet she was brutally raped by a gang of men. Like it wasn't enough, there was the case in Ibadan, Oyo State where a girl was raped and murdered in her fathers house!

The #Saynotorape campaign is one we all need to carry with our chests. It is not enough to say the girls wear skimpy clothes or they asked for it. If a girl says no, she means no! No stories, no excuses... Same applies to a boy of course. Even if she parades the streets naked, it is not enough to rape her! What are you, an animal?

We all need to lend our voices this time around (and with all other cases too) to say #EnoughisEnough. #SayNoToRape. While this campaign may not save the others who have been raped in the past, we can lend our voices to ensure that our girls are protected going forward! No child deserves to feel unsafe. No child deserves to be molested, or have her dreams dashed. No child deserves the pain and horror. No child deserves to go through this!

We really need the grace to follow thorough on our passion in crying for justice, especially now that the entire world is crying for justice and asking for things to be set right. On the foreign scene, the fight for #blacklivesmatter continues following the recent killings of black skinned people. Blacks are humans too! They have blood flowing thorough their veins and have emotions. You can't just kill them or feel privileged because of the colour of your skin. #RIPBreonnaTaylor #RIPGeorgeFloyd. I was shocked when I read this article here about the number of cases before now. 

All these happening just when we thought the world was cleansing itself after the lock-down. We really need to do better as a race. 

We need to spread love not hate.
Be our brothers keeper.
Look out for one another.
Love. Love. Love!
Stand up for the truth.
Fight for the truth.
Stay Safe too.

Love, light and peace!

Tuesday, June 9, 2020

Corona Diaries- June 2019

A lot has happened since January when news of Corona Virus made the world scramble for safety and revalue our hygiene as a people. The things we took for granted suddenly became thongs to long for as the very recent past was referred to with nostalgia. One night we were fine and doing well, and the next morning we were scared beyond belief. The corona virus which was first seen in a tiny village of Wuhan in China suddenly grew wings and was spreading, spreading so fast and causing so much damage, leaving in its trail death and despair...it also helped us see as a people the need to show love just because.

As soon as the numbers began climbing in Lagos, I had already done my own #Lockdown in my family, no going out, no buying stuff. we were all just staying in. At first it was an opportunity to just laze about, load up on Tv and just chill. Then the children started getting bored, we the adult also started getting bored. The kitchen became a major attraction as we all started looking for what to munch on constantly. we cooked up a storm using new recipes we would never ordinarily have tired out as we had all the time in the world. we baked, we grilled, we fried and we made different kinds of salads...above all, we bonded so much. As a matter of fact, I learned so many new stuff and I will be sharing some of them on my business blog. I also had a chance to catch up on several DIY practicals I had abandoned due to lack of time or other more pressing needs.

Did I also mention that at first I felt really bad about the many free online (Instagram) classes I was missing out on because I was never online at the right time? I felt like I was wasting away my time while others were doing productive stuff, and these so called influencers didn't help matters the way they kept breathing down our necks with one free zoom class after another. I finally had a talk with myself and moved on without them, attended one or 2 classes when the reminders popped up but never felt bad about not being there again. I took one HBS online course (free) which I totally loved, signed up for a photography class, a French class (which is ongoing) and even had time to work on my website (spiritual work lol, as it hasn't even been effected yet).

Now, the lockdown has been lifted, with restricted movement (which I do not understand- I mean is the virus going to go on a break when the world goes on a break?- but will not question. Lagosians have gone back to the hustle and bustle and some have said the virus was just a scam, that it doesn't exist. What a shame! So the people that have died passed on from what please? Because something doesn't directly affect you exist doesn't mean that it doesn't exist. You have just been fortunate not to have it or know anyone who does.

We now go about with masks and there are sanitizers everywhere and hand wash stations too. Our children are still home, because of course the schools are not open. Not like we would send them off to school should they reopen now by the way! Life as we know it has changed, it is no longer business as usual. Some people have lost their means of livelihood. Some made mega bucks during the lockdown. Some people found a new lease for life and are now living the life they only before dreamed about. Some have made it a point of duty to turn to beggars on the street by day time and robbers by night time.

The virus has come to stay, and our lives have to move on, but we must be careful of the choices we make daily as they have a way of impacting not just our immediate environment, but the world at large.

#StayHome
#StaySafe

Friday, May 1, 2020

What would you do differently if you knew the cost of your decision today?

Recently, I have seen quite a number of people make decisions based on current prevailing situations. Not necessarily decisions that they are proud of, but choices made because they assumed that was the best for them in that situation and at that time.

For instance, a recently widowed young mother of 2 girls who had no job and no means of livelihood to survive on after her husband's demise. She sought for a job with her friends and tried all she knew. She was willing to become a commercial sex worker just to feed her little girls. She found a rich man who could have helped her out, but the man wanted her oldest daughter instead. She fought with the idea only for a few minutes, and sent her daughter into the dark cold tunnel of prostitution. She was only 14 years old when she was pushed to become a whore to feed her family.

Or is it the case of the woman who maltreated her daughter because she was the product of a gang rape? She never got to know who the real father was and took out her vexation on the poor innocent child!

A young girl tried very hard to loose her job (she needed her boss to fire her) so she could get benefits from the company which would help her establish her business. She tried so hard and prayed so much to get fired. Her boss got to find out why she kept frustrating him and trying to run down the company so he promised her that despite her misdemeanour, he wouldn't fire her. She finally got kicked by her conscience and tendered her resignation on her own. Of course she didn't get the severance package. I thought long and hard about it. If she knew her effort would be futile, would she have been so mischievous? Would she have continued to work indefinitely just for that juicy package?

An orphaned gigolo lost his only sister and best friend because his lover's husband found out about his wife's illicit affair. He became a gigolo not because he wanted to, but because he thought it was the only way out of poverty. He wanted a new life for his sister and couldn't bear to see her lack anything. As she breathe her last in his arms, his mind flashed back to the day he made up his mind to become a gigolo. Had he known it would end this way, what would he have done different? 

I saw a movie yesterday that prompted this post. So a woman raised her daughter as a single mom. They were both very happy and seemingly inseparable, regardless of their very average standard of living (The mum had a restaurant and the girl was a clerk at a supermarket). Till the daughter found out that her father (oh yes, she had a father) who had just passed on was a billionaire and had made her CEO of his company (and group of subsidiaries). The daughter was beyond mad at her mom and refused to talk to her for over a month. Her grouse? Why would her mum deny her of spending at lease 11 years with her father? What right did she have to take away her ability to choose who she wanted to be with. Her mum obviously had her reasons for lying to her for her whole life but was her reason really tenable? Should she have chosen for her? Would she have made the same decision today if she knew the outcome of her decision over 10 years ago?

This begs the question- If you know today the answer to a question asked over a decade ago, would your answer still be the same? Would you make the same choice? Would you do that thing? Or would you change your decision and chart another path?
If you knew today that what you had planned for your life over 7 years ago would lead you to where you are today, would you still go on that journey? Would you do something differently?