Blogger Widgets

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Eroding morals

Things are so different from how they used to be yesterday.Growing up, my mom always made sure we greeted the "elders" or people older than us no matter who they were. Today, if a child greets you it will make you pause. I wonder what changed all that. Jazz/the fear of jazz? or what really? Have we become so westernised that greeting people is now a chore? Or respecting people?

Yesterday I had to go to and from work by bus. On my way to work, I took a Keke Napep and sat at the edge. An elderly woman got in beside me and I mumbled a good morning to her. She in turn mumbled her reply and that got me grinning. (who says garbage in garbage out doesn't work?). Anyway, a third person got in beside this woman and asked her to move. She didn't want to move so she made me her excuse. Egba mi ke! How my size take konsin the matter? She spoke in yoruba and I got her message loud and clear. She said Orobo n'joko bayi or something like that while pointing by me. I just looked at her and wiggled my butt on the seat, giving them the impression that I had moved. You can't blame me for that. First off, I may be big but I won't take 2 people's butt space, secondly, because she didn't want to move she lied that it was because I was fat. 

IMG-20131113-WA0000.jpgNa wa ooo. I didn't know that old people lied like that ooo especially on seemingly innocent angelic shidren like me (Adjusting my halo).

On my way back from work, I was tired and cranky. I got to the part where I had to take another Keke and there was none within sight. I had waited and waited still nothing. then finally, one came. I shouldered my bag properly and gathered my lunch bag firmly for good effect and flexed my leg. As the keke came to a stop I just used my big butt to push the chick beside me and held onto the bar separating the driver from the passengers and had already started entering when I remembered my good manners. I sighed dramatically and gave way to he elderly woman standing beside me. She knew she was no match for the rest of us, but she still tried. She was so shocked that I could give up my seat for how despite my lagos-style-bus-diving antics that she didn't enter at first till I said "mama enter na". Then she entered. What now spoilt everything was instead of the mama to enter and move so I could still enter, she just sat down there. Ha! After I did you a good thing, abi? I asked her to move and she had the mind to tell me that "Ah, why didn't you want to enter? Are you not going again?" I just gritted my teeth and said no. Ah, I just told my self to move as it was paining me gan. Luckily, another one came probably 5 mins after. This time around it was one baba and I that were fighting for the seat. As the baba no gree for me to enter, me sef I no gree for am ooo. I won that battle as I got in before him, but I felt really bad. But not so bad that I would have given up the seat for him sha. At that point, if I were light-skinned I would probably have been red in the face. I could actually hear my mum tsk-tsk-tsking at me for my misconduct.

This brings to mind a convo my friends and I had 2 weeks ago about BRT Buses. At the bus terminals, you will see people queuing in 2 directions. Those who will get seating space and the "standees". What amazes me is that people come late to the line and will go to the "standees" line to queue, even elderly people. When you board the bus and its full, you see the standees entering and they take their place on the isles and just grab the hangers. Then you see elderly people doing same. The 1st time I took BRT to the office, I noticed an elderly woman, I stood up for her. the next day I stood up for a man. By the third day, my heart had been reinforced with concrete. I just carried my face. Theses elderly people do it intentionally. They will join the standees queue knowing that "someone" will stand up for them. I refused to be their "someone". I learned the hard way that they were just being selfish. Its wrong I know, but I just can't deal with it any more. Before elders didn't drag issues with the young ones, now, they don't even see them selves as elders any more. Everyone is "hustling" 

If you greet a stranger now, there must be strings very thick ropes attached. You obviously want something.

You can't carry a random woman's bag to help her with her groceries or shopping bags. They will brand you a thief. (If you are lucky you won't get mobbed)

You don't see someone who needs help and help the person (You will be tagged as someone who uses people for jazz)

A child grabbed my legs the other day as she was playing. I started praying to God to remove her hands ooo. Not because I was afraid, but because I didn't want anyone to brand me as a kidnapper if I happened to hold her hand.

Children don't even play in the streets any more because their parents are afraid, The sit in from of the TV all day (now you know why child obesity is on the rise).

I'd go on and on and still not finish. What exactly is happening today? 

Please use the comment box, it's meant for you. Thank you.


  1. As I read about the elderly woman that said "Ah, why didn't you want to enter? Are you not going again?", I jus dey wonder how people dey do sha. It reminds me of one day I wanted to board keke to obalende. As I approached the bus stop, I saw one keke waiting so I increased my strides so the driver wouldn't have to wait for long. The moment I sat in the keke, come and hear epe (swear) from one elderly woman who apparently had plans of taking the keke too but couldn't meet up because of her slow steps. She cursed and cursed and swore and "sheped" of which I didn't even know it was directed @ me, it was one of the passengers that then told me she was trying to get into the keke too but I beat her to it. God knows i didn't know she was about boarding it too...the driver too just zoomed off immediately I was seated, so no be my fault. I sha covered myself with the blood and also said "BACK TO SENDER" (in my mind sha) cos words are powerful. God dey sha.

    1. Ahan! Swear levels ke? I will rebuke it and send it back o jare. Na wa ooo. evil times indeed.

  2. It's really sad, Ema. I've got a thing for kids too. In my unchecked nature, you'd probably catch random kids and I exchanging funny facial gestures. But, I've begun to tone it down; not everyone will understand.

    The world is now laden with [saddening] options and possibilities that didn't exist when and where we grew up.

    Respect for elders used to be absolute. Now, it's per context. Often, elders forget what they [should] stand for too. It's a crazy world we now live in.

    Still, I take respect for my elders pretty seriously - and show it where circumstance permits.

    All that said, please never call me out in this manner again. There's absolutely no way you'd get in a napep before me - even with a jetpack!


    1. Hmn, You really have to be careful ooo. No parent of today has time to think twice especially with the terrible news of abuse and molestation we hear these days.
      I agree ooo, most times elders forget what they should or what they stand for. Really really sad.

      Oya lets compete ooo. Don't mess with my Lagos street-wise abilities at all. Bring it on!!!! lol

  3. me na leecious design gift I want.

    1. Hahaha. You missed it already jor. Didislim won the prize. #wink.