Nigeria needs help

Today was all forms of weird.  We need serious help in this country.

I left my house after 10am today because of the environmental sanitation.  I went to my friends house to pick up the cake I had ordered for my brother's birthday. I couldn't sleep for the better part of the night and my friend on the other hand went for a vigil and went home to start baking. So neither of us had had sleep.

We left the house, stopped at a supermarket to pick up a few things for my mum. I didn't get  what i wanted so we had to go to another one, then went on our way to deliver the cake and just visit. We had reached Big Treat  round about at Ogba and that's where trouble started.
The traffic light was amber and we were so engrossed in our gist  that 3 police officers jumped us and surrounded the car. It was at that point the light turned red. Three of them wanted to enter the car but we refused and only a police women entered and asked us to keep moving.  At a point, the other police officers took a keke marwa and joined us. I think they assumed their colleague was greedy and wanted to be sure they would get their cut. The 1st police woman opened the door for the other lady and asked us to keep moving forward to their station. At some point, they asked us to pull over and started telling us all sorts of things about how if we go to their station, they will detain us and we would have to pay for demurage and all sorts of funk.  My friend at that point was like lets go, I was still trying to be diplomatic as I knew it was *fine bara* that was worrying them.

Suddenly,  a black Nissan pulls up beside us and is trying to block us. The back windows were tinted, but I could make out a policeman at the back seat. We keep moving and the car keeps up at the same pace. Next thing, the  women ask us to speed up that it was their bosses car and that if they caught up with us, they would "ton" (tow) the car and all sorts of crap. I just asked my friend to speed up. My intention was to keep driving till they would beg us to just drop them off. Unfortunately,  the traffic and bad roads wouldn't have made that an option.
We make a u-turn at the FRSC junction and park at that filling station and the 1st police woman now says we should do what we want to do. I just hiss, reach into my bag, pull out N2, 500 from my wallet and give the ugly black woman who snatches it from my hand. By then my friend has killed me with her eyes and proceeds to shred me with her words. I just tell her to keep driving. We are both visibly angry at this stage, she at me for giving the money and me at the greed and level of corruption exhibited by the "uniform" that has sworn to protect us.

The black Nissan pulls up beside us again and the driver comes down and chastises the women. He tells them that they are women like us and they were just being unduly wicked and he says he is an ex-police officer. He reprimands them and says that in this day where officers are getting booted for little corrupt acts, that they are not afraid that someone somewhere has them on camera. We jejely thank this good Samaritan and begin our waka. As we made to pull out of the station the 1st greedy woman comes to the passenger side to attempt to talk to us. My friend was so mad that she almost crushes her. I had to laugh at the way she flew out of our way. The 2nd woman stops us again and surprisingly hands me back my money. I am shocked beyond words (hmn, maybe she has jazzed it) and refuse to reach out to collect it. She hands it over to my friend who tells the woman that she should give it back to the person who gave it to her. She then presses it into my hands and they both walk away. I sha covered the money with the blood of Jesus and put it  back in my purse, I cant shout. :)
Anyway, we stop to thank the good Samaritan again and move on. Its really rare to find people in this country who will stop to help you out without strings attached.

I pray for Nigeria.  We need help, and we are the only ones who can help ourselves.
Change begins with us. I am totally ashamed that I found myself trying to bribe someone, but in my defence which is really no excuse,  I had had just 2 hours of sleep and my day needed to be good.

Have you had any bad experience with the "uniform"? How was it resolved?  Please share it with us.

P.s.- have you nominated my blog for the best personal blog? Ahan, what are you waiting for na... hurry ooo. Just visit this link http://nigerianblogawards.com/register2013.php and nominate the blog (www.writeventuresofemaleecious.blogspot.com) in number 17 category. 

Xoxo

Nigerian Blog Award Nomination

Its Saturday. I'm so excited. I just need a long weekend. How did your week go?

Have you heard about the Nigerian Blog Awards? Its an annual event that started in 2010 to recognize excellent bloggers (as determined by no one but you- the blog readers and followers). Its open to Nigerians (at home, abroad and wherever else possible. #wink). 

I know we all think know my blog is excellent. I think same too. But please I need you to back it up by voting for me this year. Nominations for the Nigerian Blog Award is still ongoing. 

Please vote my blog for the Best Personal Blog!!!

Here's what you need to do:

1. Visit this link Nomination and submit a nomination for each category. 
2. My primary concern is Number 17- Please put my full blog name- www.writeventuresofemaleecious.blogspot.com- in the slot.
3. You must provide a valid email for the nomination to be counted and registered.
4. Once you have submitted, please go back to your email and validate your nomination by following the instruction.
5. Please remember that only one blog can be nominated per category
6. Forms that nominate the same blog for all categories will be disqualified.
7. Finally, if you make errors in your submission, send an email to nigerianblogawards@gmail.com and appropriate changes will be made.

Please nominate me for the Best Personal Blog.
Dazzall!

Thank you very much.

Have a great weekend!

Track your vehicle

Bisi was dressed to kill at the wedding and she knew it. Not only was she smoldering her car also spoke volumes. She stepped out of her ride, shut the door and moved on to the party. She was fashionably late and there was a reason to it. It paid off. Every eye at the party turned to stare. Male, female and even children. She looked like she actually stepped out of the covers of a magazine.

At the end of the event, she was tired, she had danced for one hour and she needed to go home. Mission accomplished. She stepped out to the spot where she left her car. Alas, it wasn't there anymore. Her dismay didn't know any efizzi. She dropped her bag, kicked off her heels and sat on the floor with her beautiful hair in her hands. Where on earth was she going to find her car? Someone asked her if she had installed a tracker on it and she sadly shook her head no.

Be wise. Learn from Bisi's experience!!!

I write to introduce to you OUTECH SECURE, we are leaders nationwide in the provision of Automatic Vehicle Location Service (AVLS). We are introducing AVLS in Nigeria as a response to the rising cases of car snatching and also to curtail abuse by drivers. Our AVLS technology communicates using a wireless protocol combined with an inbuilt GPS device communicating at predetermined intervals with our control centre, to give us real-time location of the vehicle, longitude and latitude, speed acceleration plus direction of movement.

We offer you a very reliable real-time security and monitoring solution that will enable you monitor and locate your vehicles round the clock nation wide.

We can also help you monitor the speed of your driver's real time and the position of your vehicle to check unauthorized movements, which leads to huge losses in management time and resources.

We know you will benefit immensely from our AVLS package as it will protect your vehicle from loss nationwide, while also reducing your total overhead cost due to monitoring.

Our device is installed in your vehicle in a safe and discrete place. The device in the vehicle is the modem for communication between the vehicle and control center. We have however taken further steps to give our clients more options by the introduction of an option that enables the client to monitor/locate, immobilize or carry out any operation regarding his/her vehicle personally using a G.S.M. phone without having to use the internet or calling control center.

FEATURES OF OUTECH SECURE AVLS

24 hours/ 7 days a week real-time vehicle information

Automatic Location - knowing the position of your vehicle nationwide

Real-time speed recording

Remote immobilization of vehicle

Programmable Geo-fencing

Speed Limit Monitor

Backup Battery

Personal tracking reports on your G.S.M. phone

Personal Vehicle Location Service

Fleet monitor from your PDA, Smart Phone or Laptop

etc.

For further information

Please contact

OMOLARA TURTON

08160704554, 07085406442

omolaraturton@yahoo.com

Tuesday Tease

Hello everyone. Trust your week started on a good note? If it did, Yay for you! May it get even better :) 

If it didn't, I'm sorry about that.. I wish you a better rest-of-the-week though. May you have cause to smile through out today!

I'm excited today, I really don't know why. But 2 people have commented on how radiant and bubbly I am today. Its a good thing I guess. My week didn't start out so well yesterday. About yesterday...

I just wasn't feeling my office yesterday at all. I was kind of sourly throughout, that is until I got a pack of small chops. Let me give you a bit of office history with small chops.

******

One day, we were working normally and jejely when someone decided to celebrate one thing (I don't even remember what is is anymore) and he bought us all small chops. It was really nice. Its so nice that I'd tell you the name of the company and put down the number sef (I just really dig them). The small chops company is Freset and you can reach them on 08023393499. Anyway, that's how we all got addicted to Freset. Most times, we just gather resources together and buy. We found out that we don't have to pay for delivery if we buy up to 10 packs.

Back to the story.

******

I was just not feeling my office, when my friend came in from a seminar herself and another colleague had organized. Next thing she called me to come help her with the small chops downstairs. I was happy. I rushed to call the elevator, when I got there and called it, someone gave me a message for my boss. I ran to deliver. I got back and called the elevator again, and my boss met me there and remembered she needed to get something from her office for the meeting she was going for. As she was already late, she sent me on another errand. I delivered it again and walked to the elevator again. This time I didn't bother rushing. I called the elevator again and waited for it to come up. When it was on 5th floor, I suddenly realized I needed to pee. I hissed and went to the loo. By the time I got out of the loo, the elevator had passed again. Na wa ooo. All for small chops. I finally had to bind all the spirits that were making me just exercise up and down and finally went downstairs (feeling happy that I had won the race I was running by myself). Alas, I didn't see S when I went down. So I called her and she didn't pick. I waited and waited till I started feeling really foolish. All on top small chops. Oga o.

I finally took myself upstairs and saw her bag on her seat. I didn't find it funny o, after all my waka up and down and she had finally made it up and didn't even think to call me. So she came out and just handed me a bag with my small chops I just sat down and had a good time. Guilty conscience didn't allow me take the drink that was in the bag. I figured I had taken all my required calories for the day. That didn't stop me from eating another person's mosa though. There's something about me and plantain...

Before then, I was chatting with my sister and I sent her a picture of my mid-day salad. She encouraged me and my head was "bigging" seriously. Only for me to eat the small chops and clean my mouth. Of course I didn't send her the picture ofthe small chops. My mind had already condemned me enough jare. I sha respected myself and didn't have lunch again. But by the time I got home yesterday, I was really weak and my legs were shaking badly. I didn't even know if it was due to hunger or stress at work, or the fact that I closed so late. I sha made a nice healthy sandwich for myself and went to bed. My friend sent me a pack of delicious red-velvet cake. I had to taste it and force myself to only taste and not eat. (If you want cake, holler at her- 08056545951. She makes mouth melting pieces). I actually ignored my stomach and went to bed. I think my mind finally delivered the message to my brain.

******

So this morning, I got to work and respected my stomach and weight loss program by having a bowl of fruit salad. It didn't satisfy me, but I know I have to pay for the grave sins I committed yesterday. (I'm going to have beans for lunch and I pray I don't get hungry by dinner time). Anyway, S brought her digital scale to the office and I weighed myself. Jesus!!!! I need help from above. All this while I thought I was eating healthy, I have actually gained 8kg. How does this weight creep in? How do you eat salads (without dressing) and practice portion control and still add weight? Something is not tallying up. Honestly. I know I have tried and yet...#GrandSigh. 

God have mercy on this fat fluffy chic...please, na beg level I dey so ooo.

*****

The Nigerian Blog Award Season is finally upon us. Please click here to vote this blog as the best personal blog. Its number 17 on the list. Please put my full blog name ooo (www.writeventuresofemaleecious.blogspot.com) and please share so others can vote as well. 

 I have also put up a badge on the top right corner of my blog. to promote NBA. Please also vote for your favorite blogs in other categories. But remember, No 17 is meant for my blog name. Pretty please. Thank you.

The Executive Presence

Today I stumbled on an email I want to share with you. Its a bit lengthy, but its worth the read, so buckle up!

What Is Executive Presence (and Are You Getting Feedback to Acquire it)?

By Sylvia Ann Hewlett

President Obama has it. Jamie Dimon has it. Steve Jobs had it in spades. So did Margaret Thatcher.

No man or woman attains power or exerts influence without it — executive presence (EP), that aura of confidence and competence that convinces others that you deserve to be in charge.

But what is executive presence? Do you have it? If not, are you getting the feedback you need to acquire it?

The 3 pillars of executive presence

The Center for Talent Innovation (CTI) delved down into these questions in 2012, fielding a nationwide survey and conducting a ton of focus groups. We found that executive presence comprises three universal dimensions.

Whether you work on Wall Street or in Silicon Valley, how you act (gravitas), how you speak (communication), and how you look (appearance) count for a lot in determining your leadership presence.

These three pillars of EP do not stand independent of each other. For example, if your communication skills enable you to command a room, your gravitas or aura of authority grows exponentially. Conversely, if your presentation is rambling and your manner is diffident or timid, your gravitas suffers.

While all three pillars contribute to EP, they don’t contribute equally. Gravitas provides the real heft, according to 67 percent of the 268 senior executives we surveyed, more salient than either communication (28 percent) or appearance (5 percent). To uncover this elusive quality we conducted focus groups and interviews with senior executives.

The most important of these, we discovered, is the first. — “Grace under fire.” This amounts to keeping your cool no matter how much heat you’re subjected to.

Appearance? Absolutely essential to EP

JPMorgan’s CEO Jamie Dimon displayed considerable poise, for example, when Congress grilled him in June 2012 for failing to forestall some $5.8 billion in trading losses — a performance that won him investor confidence even as the losses in question drove down the stock. Exuding confidence is something any good actor can manage, but projecting credibility as well as confidence as you’re riding out a crisis is truly the mark of a leader, our research confirms.

Because your communication skills help project gravitas, they’re the next most critical aspect of EP. But great speaking skills are not enough. You’ve got to be attuned to use them at just the right moment and know when to turn up the warmth and humor and when to unleash the pit bull.

One executive (who is also a PhD) at a $20 billion food and facilities management firm describes how she used to deliver presentations steeped in data, models, and academic research, slowly building to her point — and quickly losing her audience. Now she presents the business case first, laced with key facts and short stories.

She offers detailed data only when asked. “My strength today as a leader is my communication,” she notes. “I’ve gotten good at reading my audience quickly and adjusting my style or tailoring my message accordingly.”

While seen as far less important than gravitas and communication, appearance turns out to be absolutely essential to EP as a bar to hurdle first in order to be assessed in other, more substantive areas.

Kalinda, the real-estate analyst, remembers her first meeting with the woman who would eventually sponsor her: “She told me, ‘Go get your nails done. Wear some makeup. Figure out a hairstyle. You need a makeover, because you look like a little kid, and I am not going to trust a little kid to do a grownup’s job.’”

Feedback failure

Kalinda, who prided herself on her grasp of intricate financial data and her preparedness, was taken aback. This was what she needed to do to break through to the next level? But she took her superior’s advice and polished her look.

Less than three months later, she was given a managerial role. “Part of it was timing,” Kalinda says, “but definitely senior leaders’ percep¬tion of me changed. They already knew I could handle more responsibility; it’s just that now they could see I was ready for the next step.”

Knowing what gives rise to executive presence (or destroys it) is half the challenge. The other half is in knowing how to apply the lessons to your role in your workplace. That’s where a sponsor comes in.

Sponsors, unlike mentors, will level with you, giving you unvarnished feedback on your executive presence because you’re walking around with their brand on. The degree to which you’re seen as having what it takes directly impinges on your sponsor’s reputation as a leader.

But either because most women and people of color lack sponsors, or because their sponsors aren’t living up to their duties, they’re not getting this critical feedback. That was the disturbing finding of CTI’s research.

Women get more scrutiny for appearance

A partner at one of the Big Four accounting firms told us about a young woman on his UK team whose appearance — she was curvy, blonde, and provocatively dressed — communicated something other than gravitas. Indeed, one client found her look so distracting that he asked that she be removed from the team. “It doesn’t help to have the trolley-dolly image,” the client admonished the team’s leader.

The leader, vexed at her and his own inability to confront her about her appearance, took her off the account. But he did ask someone in HR to enroll her in a course on presentation skills and client interaction. To her credit, the young woman made the connection between image and impact and transformed her look.

“She’s a different person now, a real rising star on the team,” this partner commented. “I should have had the courage to give her feedback before.”

This story shows not only how honest feedback can make a career-changing difference, but also how leaders struggle to impart this advice, particularly if the would-be Pygmalion leader is male and the object of his concern is female.

Women are much more highly scrutinized for how they look and dress than their male peers but are 32 percent less likely, according to CTI research, to get any feedback from male superiors. Men, we’ve learned, will readily toss off correctives to guys they barely know — as in, “Your breath’s a bit off; you might want to have a mint” — but will avoid confronting a female with much-needed guidance even if she’s an important member of their team.

Staying on the edge is difficult

There are reasons for this reluctance, of course. Male executives don’t wish to make comments about a wom­an’s appearance for fear those comments will be misconstrued as sexual harassment. It’s wiser to ignore a hiked-up skirt than be sued for commenting on it.

Yet senior females, our research shows, are no better than senior men at being forthcoming: only 39 percent of female survey respondents told us they’d ever gotten EP advice from a same-sex supervisor.

When women do get feedback, it’s often distressingly con­tradictory, with criticism leveled from all sides. Unkempt nails detract from female EP, survey respondents told us. But they also found “overly done” nails to be unleader-like. Too much makeup undermines a woman’s credibility, but respondents also faulted women for wearing too little or no makeup and looking like they’re not trying.

Being too asser­tive (and seen as a bitch) was problematic for women, but so was not being assertive enough (and being seen as a shrink­ing violet). The contradictions went on and on: being “too bossy” undermines a woman’s EP, but so does being “too passive”; “tooting her own horn” detracts, but so does “self-deprecating” behavior. It’s little wonder that 81 percent of women who do receive feedback tell us they have trouble finding the sweet spot.

Staying on that knife-edge between too little and too much seems to be extremely difficult.

Reprinted by permission of Harvard Business Review Press. Excerpted from Forget a Mentor, Find a Sponsor: The New Way to Fast-Track Your Career, by Sylvia Ann Hewlett. Copyright 2013. All rights reserved.

Sylvia Ann Hewlett is the founding president of the Center for Talent Innovation, a non-profit think tank where she chairs a task force of 75 global companies focused on fully realizing the new streams of high-echelon labor in the global marketplace. She is currently ranked No. 11 on theThinkers50 list of the world's most influential business think

Credit for this article goes to . I get really thought provoking emails from them from time to time.

On time

Yesterday I was feeling down and blue and put up the post Within Reach. I had just hit publish when I went back to my mail box and sitting there waiting for me was an email which was like an answer to an unspoken prayer. Here's a grabbed screen.

I couldn't help it I cried. It was just what I needed to hear/see. A confirmation that Isaiah 65:24 is not an empty promise. I cried and then laughed some then I talked to my Heavenly Father. I know all things are working together for my good, and even though I can't see the picture falling in place, its still falling in place.

I pray you get the unshakable knowledge that He is right beside you and will never ever leave you alone. No matter the situation or circumstance.

Has God ever answered you speedily before? Do you want to share it in the comment section?

Within Reach?

I'm sitting on my seat and thinking of my friend Simi Akinseye to myself- There has to be more to all this. 

I mean how hard can it be to be really occupied? I practically have nothing to do. This has been the case for a while now. The highlight of my week is reading an official email that requires me to task myself. I haven't had reason to think outside the box or stimulate my mind since May. 

Everyday I see job vacancies. Everyday I keep searching. Is there really a job out there that I will do and wont complain of boredom? Some of my colleagues are in a meeting in the room not too far from me. I hear them discuss and reach agreements. Progress is being made. They are relevant. In their own way. 

I think I am grossly under-utilized and its such a shame. I'm stuck in a rut right now, in between careers. I am in a field I do not like and I'm trying to cross carpet to a field that really interests me. Its hasn't been an easy journey. I have commitments that hinder me. I have dreams that are somewhat unattainable. I have desires that are somehow beyond reach. The thing I desire is near yet so far. 

How do I get there? How do I leave here? Have I learned the lessons I should here? To be honest, I think I have exceeded my time here, I know I should move beyond this point, but the future scares me. 

As much as I want a change, I am scared of the change. 

What if it doesn't work out? What if I fall flat on my face? What if it gets better here?

So many things whirl through my mind. thoughts. plans. decisions to be made. All that is lacking is action...and of course finances to plod on. I know, Life in itself is a risk and I have reached a point where I am willing to take that plunge, because not to do so will be to deny myself of what will make me be what I want to be.

Where do I go from here? I look in the mirror and sometimes the reflection confuses me. Its still me, but its me in a different form. Its me alright, but its not the me I expected to see now.

I want to be relevant. I know it's not too much to ask for. On the contrary its odd. I know people who wish they were in my shoes with nothing to do. I am thankful I am where I am, but I do not want to simple exist. I want to be relevant. 

Where do I go from here?

Source

Supervisors needed for an Eatery in Ikeja

An eatery, based in Ikeja seeks qualified supervisors (5) to handle any of the following:

1. Processing of fruit juices

2. Continental Dishes

3. African Cuisine

4. Chinese

5. Ice Cream.

Requirements:

1. At  least 2 years experience in a well known eatery/hospitality.

Preferred Educational Background:

1. Bsc. Biochemistry

2. Food technology

3. Hotel and Catering Management

4. Microbiology

5. Food and Nutrition

Pls Note:  Experienced applicants with other academic backgrounds will be considered.

Others:

1. Good customer relations

2. Good entrepreneurial/business acumen

3. Readiness to resume by first week in October

NOTE: REMUNERATION PACKAGE IS AS COMPETITIVE AS REQUIRED BY THE INDUSTRY.

Please send an email to ask4ema AT gmail.com to indicate interest. Ensure you put in the position as subject of the email. (Please replace AT with @)

Thank you.

To my Blog Ghosts

I see you...and I know you know this.

Please I need you to comment...and share. That's all I'm asking.

I know you read most posts because of little slips when we talk. But I'm just asking for a little love on:

• The blog. Please leave a comment. I love to hear from you- http://writeventuresofemaleecious.blogspot.com/
• Twitter- A little Retweet of the posts will definitely go a long way- my twitter handle is-https://twitter.com/emaleecious
• Facebook- Please visit my page- Facebook link and don't forget to like it too.
• And Any other social site I may have forgotten right now.

Please spread the love. If you gain anything from here, let someone also benefit from it.

Thank you...plenty.

P.S- Thanks to my new followers. I appreciate. 

Business Minders

I totally hate it when people are busy bodies. 

Just mind your own business. Stop trying to know everything. It doesn't just concern you!!!

Source

What good will you do when you finally know? Will you make it better? Or do you want to file it in the credenza for "People's Business" and brandish it like a trophy when gossip comes visiting?

Why do you want to know if she gave birth through CS or by "natural means"? Why not just ask if the mom and baby (ies) are doing OK?

Why do you want to know how old she is if she says she got engaged? Will her age make her a better wife?

Why in this world do you want to know how much he paid for the new house he is moving to? Can you or will you reimburse him? Will you subsidize his rent?

Why do you want to know if she is pregnant? Did you sleep with her? Are you God? Can you give life?

Why do you want to know how much he is earning? Will you do the job for him? Will the knowledge swell your own coffers? 

Why do you want to know how she died? Will you play God and bring her back to life?

Why do you want to know every single detail about my life?

If I ask you a simple question, I hardly ever get an answer. Yet with each bbm update, you stalk me. Asking me: "Why?", "Who?", "When?", "Where?", "How?"

Source

No one probably tells you anything anymore simply because it will become common news. If I ever need to publicize anything, all i have to do is come to you. and guess what? The whole world knows my business. Free of charge.

Stop being a gossip. Get a life of your own.

Mind your damn business!!!!

Numbered

Source

Every one has numbered days. Whether we like it or not, even if you choose to ignore or you decide to read this post. Our days on this earth as we know it are numbered. The funny thing is no one knows the exact hour or time of his/her final second, that last breath. But one day, the breath we take will be our last and we will leave this world for judgement. 

Where will you go?

Psalm 90:12 - Teach us to number our days and recognize how few they are; help us to spend them as we should.

Just yesterday, I learned of a friend's passing and it shook me to my core.

Tayo was so quiet while we were in school together. He had his click of friends and I always thought to myself that he looked odd. Among them I mean. All his friends seemed boisterous and outgoing, he on the other hand seemed somewhat reserved. But he fit in well and they all loved each other. In the 4 years we were in school together, I may not even have said more than a sentence per conversation with him, but I knew him to an extent. We finished school, and we heard he had a magazine and all that. Progress. Very good to know. Next thing we know, he's dead. Gone. It was too close to home. For the better part of yesterday, I was in real shock. It was way too close to home. I kept thinking- Did he know when the final moment came? Was he prepared? Was he afraid? Did he fight it?

Would he have lived his last hours differently if he had known it would be the end? 

Would his family and/or friends have treated him differently if they had known that they wouldn't see his cool cute smile again?

Would it have mattered?

"Mene, Mene, Tekel, Parsin". Do you remember it? If you don't (or if you have forgotten) its in the Book of Daniel. Daniel 5:25 (Please read 25- 28) May God not weigh you on His just scales and find you wanting. (Amen)

Throughout yesterday, this scripture kept coming to mind- Teach us to number our days that we may apply our hearts to wisdom. It was the only prayer I could utter. If you know how long you have to do something, you will work towards delivering your very best on or before that day. If you have an exam, you would study hard for it. If you had a task at work, you would put in your best to meet and even surpass the target. Life is what we have been given by God and a set on instructions in the Holy Book as well as the holy Spirit to serve as our guide and conscience. Do not deprive yourself of Heaven. Strive towards making it there. 

My life is far from perfect but I know one thing. I need heaven like I need air to survive. 

What about you?

Rest In Peace 'Tayo Omidiji. Your candle may have burned out, but your legend will remain.

Rain- By Labake Amoo

Source

Eluded by the clouds, for what will be has come in its season. 

Entrapped in four walls of what none can be released from except time be reversed. 

The darkness is brought by it and hope is raised that it would last for the night and light would come in d morning. Flowing rivers get filled, a time to reminisce, to make love and enjoy the moments...

When caught up in the hour a thousand drops will thy fate be drenched in, washed away as much as agony is never the best bet. 

Cold, wet and no one's bosom to run into.

The awaited hour has come again and it goes but leaves its mark on all. 

For its presence is impressed and always felt. 

All eyes look ahead as it leaves but no one can anticipate its return. 

Until that moment when its moist is smelt a thousand miles away again..

----

About: Labake is a final year student of Educational Administration at the University of Lagos. She is also a chef (Food Cottage & Services) where she cooks up sumptuous local and international dishes like an angel. She writes inspiring pieces from time to time and hopes to discover her writing skills with time.

A good laugh

I haven't laughed from the bottom of my belly for such a long time. I kept laughing until I thought I would be ill. It was my sister in-law (SIL). She dropped by for a visit on Sunday. I must confess when she came in that afternoon, I wasn't the very best hostess. I was really tired from the previous day.

I had been to Redemption Camp with my family friends (It was an amazing experience by the way) and I just followed them home after services and spent the rest of the night ( I think morning makes more sense) at their guest room. When we woke up, we ( I gave her moral support) women made breakfast for the husband and left the house immediately. She was supposed to drop me off at home, but somehow we ended up going to markets. Yes, 2 markets on different sides of Lagos. We first went to Mushin market to stock up on provisions (Mehn, things are ridiculously cheap there) and I ended up buying things I didn't really need but couldn't resist because of the amazing prices. Next time I go there, (Oh yes, no more Shoprite!, well, except for my spices, and minced meats and yogurts ...ok, I give up. I'd go where the wind blows abeg.) I'd make sure I have a list and stick to it. Then we went to Oyingbo Market to stock up on the soup and stew ingredients. 

We actually had a good time together, but we were bone weary by the time she got me home. I had to start preparing meals for the week immediately. (Luckily, hubby had done an amazing job cleaning up the house and making his breakfast. Oh, and I think he reads my posts, so I will keep mentioning him and his good deeds so it can keep flowing, Lol). Anyway, I decided to outdo my self in the kitchen, and by Sunday, I was still feeling tired. 

Back to my original post, I had just had my lunch when SIL came. I stayed up with her until I begged her to excuse me so I could just take a nap. By the time I woke up, I went straight to the kitchen to finish up where I stopped yesterday. The rest of the day passed in a blur so I didn't really have time for her.

When I got home from work yesterday, we gisted for a bit and I convinced her to have Pancakes for dinner (I really didn't want to make 2 different meals since that was what hubby was to have for dinner). We were making it together when she started with her tales. She told me of her escapades in Lagos (She's based in Ilorin) and especially her experiences at a church here in Lag. Whenever she's in Lag, she stays with her cousins and they worship at a certain Church on the Island. She is convinced that there are "mammy-waters" in that church as they are always fresh and on point. She said and I summarize- Their make-up always makes you not want to look in the mirror as you know you have done a horrible job on your face. Their clothes nko? If they wear such things to my Catholic Church in Ilorin, they wont even allow them enter the church. In fact they can't leave their houses like that. Ha, I didn't talk about their shoes- They heels are longer than this cooking spoon (pointing at a spoon in the kitchen) and they will park their cars and walk in those heels to church. Omoh, they have to be mammy water jor. The day I wanted to feel among nobody told me to remove my heels and wear my normal church shoes. Whenever I go there, I don't even bring out my phone, all the tablets and "i-everything" can give me complex. I also unconsciously check my skin colour against who ever is sitting next to me and wonder if its butter they rub on their bodies.

SIL had so many things to say, I just kept laughing and laughing. It really felt good to have the truth said as we get so used to seeing all these things that its no longer strange to us.

But her words got me thinking. How come we don't even raise an eyebrow at things people wear to church anymore. Now its more like a fashion competition among ladies in church. Everything is eye-popping, its no wonder we hardly listen in church anymore. We are too distracted by the things around us to properly settle to listen in God's house. Now-a-days, its hard not to think the church is a party with the way people are dressed. With all the tales going on about pastors and female church members, its no wonder. 

Speaking of dressing- one day after church hubby and I were making our way out to the car park. There was this chic in front of us who was painstakingly making her way on the graveled part to the car park. Her heels were ridiculously sky high and she wasn't having it easy at all. She walked like she had logs and wet cement bags tied to her legs. We patiently waited for her to keep walking as we were having a good time watching her. The people behind us all started passing comments (none was nice or flattering in any way) and by the time she reached the mini-gate that separated the car park from the church premises, a driver was honking wildly and got our attention. Next thing we heard was "oh no" from the chick. Apparently, she had to make a u-turn to go meet the guy. We all started laughing and some "wicked" guys told her sorry as she made her way all the way back to where the car was. 

P.S- I am not advocating that we dress like nuns or whatever to church, but I think a little decency in God's house is necessary. Save the party clothes for parties and wear the decent ones at the back of your wardrobe to church. 

P.S (2)- I know I have had many typos in the last few posts...I sincerely apologize especially if there is any in this post. I just don't have the strength to read through it again.

xoxo

3 powerful words...I am sorry

Yesterday, I left the office early I wanted to go home so I could cook. I felt I hadn't really been cooking for T (well while compared to the times when I used to have our lunch for a whole week ready by Sunday). So I stopped at the market before going home. Unfortunately I hadn't done the dishes the night before and we had guests, so I had to tackle the dishes, put my kitchen in order then start cooking. I am one of those people who cook in clean spaces only (#wink).

By the time I was ready to cook, I was already getting tired, but I thought of my plan and all my fresh veggies and I knew I had to get to work. Well, I was only able to make a small pot of Spaghetti, white rice with peas, fish stew and pancakes for his dinner. I really wanted to make sandwiches for his breakfast as well, but I just didn't have the strength to go on. I just dumped the veggies in the fridge. 

He came home while I was making the pancakes and drops a loaf of bread on the fridge. Hubby has apparently missed the sandwiches too (not made 'em in over a week). I tell him he will have to do without it and I can see his sad face. So I encourage him to make it himself, he says "ok, maybe later" but knowing him well, he wouldn't do it.

Anyway, I needed to put out this lunch bag and realized it wasn't in the usual place. I asked him if he brought it home on Friday and he said he forgot it. Here's the convo we had...

Me: So where do you want me to put your food for tomorrow?

T: Don't bother!

Me: (#Gasp!!! ) What? After cooking? Do you know I haven't sat down since I got back from work?

T: So what do you want me to do?

I just ignored him, handed him his dinner and stormed off to the room.

I couldn't be quiet about it and I went back to the parlor. Why did you say I shouldn't bother. It really hurt me. You could have at least apologized (I keep begging him to bring back his food bowls. Every time.). I was tired, but I wanted you to have a decent lunch tomorrow, the least you could do is be sympathetic to my effort. He says, but you didn't even give me time to explain. So I stand there waiting for the apology and when it doesn't come, I just go back to the room angrier than before. 

I get into bed and I see the indicator of my phone. I have messages. I catch up and see he also sent me an email to work on something for him. I hiss loudly. "Help kor, help ni". I drop my phone and go to sleep.

Fast forward it to early hours of this morning, He taps me and says good morning, hope you slept well? I'm sorry for what happened yesterday. I tell him its ok and apologized for being short-tempered.  Secretly, I'm over joyed. Getting an apology without asking for it is cool (lol). So I ask if he ended up making his sandwich, he said no. I rush to the kitchen and end up making toast for him. I pack up his lunch bag (Yes I had another cooler I could have used, I don't know why I was looking for trouble) and kissed him a good day. 

I am still smiling now. 

Source

Truth be told, I don't know if I would have been this cheerful if he hadn't said sorry. An apology goes a long way if said sincerely. Just 3 words, and I saw myself get up, make toast at 6 am and I was almost whistling.  

It really doesn't matter if you are actually right (or wrong), if you hurt someone with your words or actions, it builds up a wall and communication is difficult. Little things get you angrier and before long, it escalates into a cold war or even a nuclear one that has really disastrous consequences not just to the parties involved, but to friends as well.

(Read what I found here  when I was trying to see how to phrase the title for this post)

Do you need to apologize to someone? Well, what are you waiting for? Make someone soften up and maybe even whistle.

xoxo

Leibster Awards- Another shot at it

The Rules

1. Thank the blogger that nominated you
2. List 11 random facts about you.
3. Answer the questions by the blogger that nominated you.
4. Nominate 11 other bloggers
5. Ask your nominees 11 questions
6. Notify your nominees.

Thanks a lot  Inthe for nominating me again for this award. I already answered some questions here but I'd be honoured to do this again.

11 Random Things about me:

1. I just can't be friends with my boss on bbm. Its just plain weird.
2. I have to go back to driving school. (covers face)
3. I can stay indoors and not even venture out for a whole week.
4. I think I like cooking. This hasn't always been the case.
5. I don't see going to market as a big deal anymore.
6. I like trying out new things.
7. I still love Disney and I don't hide it anymore.
8. I am not easily frightened by things 
9. I no longer blog about personal stuff because it usually concerns a few people who happen to read this blog too.
10. I hate going to church alone.
11. I tell my mum a lot of personal stuff.

11 Questions by Inthe

1. Why did you start blogging?
1. I read my younger brother's blog and I challenged myself to create one.
2.  If you could be any fruit or vegetable, what would you be?
1. An orange. I can be eaten or juiced or drunk straight from. I can be versatile (used in recipes, as jam...)
3. Would you ever consider a vegetarian/vegan?
1. Nope. I love all the beef and chicken and fish I eat.
4. What was/is your favorite subject at school?
1. Maths. Its really sad because now maths just gives me a headache.
5. Are you scared of the dark?
1. Nope. I'm not scared, but I don't like being in the dark either.
6. If you could eat only one thing for the rest of your life what would it be?
1. Plantains. I love me fried plantains.
7. Favorite movie of all time?
1. I should probably say "Love and Basketball" but I think I may have switched to "Olympus has fallen". I don't get tired of it.
8. If you could change your name to anything, what would it be?
1. I love my name a lot. But I'd be partial to "Dawn".  It symbolizes a new chance
9. Are you much of an adventurer? I'm talking Bungee jumping, mountain climbing and all that Jazz?
1. Not at all. I wont even imagine doing any of those crazy things.
10. What is the greatest thing about being your Nationality?
1. Our optimism (although most times misplaced) is commendable. We are optimistic even in stupid situations that are man made.
11. What do you do to keep fit?
1. This is easy. I read all the blogs, books and what-not about keeping fit. I know all the reps and routines and what works best for which area. I eat healthy for a week at best and fall back to my usual routine. Sad but true.

My 11 Nominees

1. Blessings Outlet (http://blessingsoutlet.blogspot.com/)
2. April (http://aprillaugh.wordpress.com/)
3. Engage Gospel (http://www.engagegospel.com/)
4. Good Naija Girl (http://goodnaijagirl.com/)
5. Sugarspring (http://sugarspring-mindshade.blogspot.com)
6. My Styled Expression (http://mystyledexpressions.blogspot.com/)
7. Sabirah (http://www.labellaimperfezione.com)
8. Priscys World (http://apysworld.blogspot.com/)
9. Fowocare's blog (http://fowocare.wordpress.com)
10. In my own world (http://darkchocolateforever.blogspot.com)
11. Becqui (http://becquizworld.blogspot.com)

My Questions

1. One person you can't do without?
2. What do you do for a living?
3. Do you like it?
4. Why do you blog?
5. One thing you can't stand?
6. If you were not you, who would you like to be?
7. What turns you off? and why?
8. Favorite thing to do/place to be?
9. What you can't do without each day?
10. What do you want to be remembered for?
11. The thing that makes you crack a smile every time?

This looks so simple, but its really not that easy to get 11 things... lol!