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Thursday, June 23, 2011

Sunshine Award!!!

Yay! 
I got rays of sunshine today!!!


I am sooooooo excited! I feel loved and appreciated by my blog fam.


I was on the phone, speaking with my supervisor at work when I saw the Award by A-9ja-Great and DIDI and  this put a very "big-happy-silly-wide grin on my face".


So I am supposed to pass this Sunshine Award to 10 other bloggers that bring sunshine to Blogsville....*now-holding-my-head-in-my-hands*...I have a long list...but I am constrained, so here goes...

Please pass the Sunshine to 10 other bloggers too!!!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Mad at ...

I brushed the tears off my cheeks angrily. I was mad at myself for crying, but thankful that it was dark so no one could see them. I made my way past the very narrow dark road, that was crowded with people and vehicles of all sizes parked on both sides of the street. I angrily brushed past two teenagers who were doing a catwalk and giggling to them selves. I heard one of them cry out as my big bag brushed her, but I couldn't be bothered. I was angry at the man that made me feel worthless. But most of all, I was angry at my self for making the man wield such power over my emotions. I felt stupid all over again.
He had not just made me feel so low, he had categorized me, stamped and branded me, and put me in a box without even giving me a chance. Then he had me dispatched...
Hot angry tears rushed down my face unbidden. The more I tried to stop them the hotter and faster it poured. 
What do I want from this life?
What do people want from me?
What have I come to offer?
What chance do I have against all odds?
What is my advantage?
I left that place with one resounding thought...I may not know what I want from Life now, but I certainly know what I DO NOT WANT.
I let the tears flow freely...it helps me focus and puts things in perspective...

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

In their eyes

I see it every time I walk pass.
They plead for another chance. The look says it all, "if I had another chance, I would use it better". You see it only in the seasoned eyes. 
They are the ones who encourage the crying children to stop crying and go to school.
They tell the stubborn teens to be smart and finish their education.
They tell the fashion conscious girls to face their books and forget beauty. That if they have brains, then their beauty will be a plus.
They believe its all about getting a degree, and try to sing it to all who care to listen. Heck, they will even go out of their way to contribute to the fees of any child related to them to ensure they have it going well for them. Citing that they would have had a different portion of this life if they had listened...
Every time I pass, I see them siting in the morning, in clusters, sitting quietly. Looking at the world pass by. Wondering. Remembering. Thinking. I can't help but wonder what passes through their minds. I wonder what they had done as active youths. Did they go to work? Where they loafers? Did they get paid and look forward to the politics of the work life? Did they get good pensions?
In all my thinking, I always ended it the same way, Dear Lord, please let me retire into a beautiful life to enjoy my pension, with my family and friends too.

But its not all of them. Some have no remorse left in them, they are so hardened that even rocks would have more emotions. Some are the color of the mood they are feeling...red...with rage. They are so angry, and their anger can only be sustained by the green bottles. 
You can tell their age by looking into their eyes...(if you are lucky to do so and go unscathed. By their words.
With these ones, you can tell that they think they will suddenly stumble on the "good life". They harass the bus drivers who want to make a living to give them their "usual fee". They harass the women selling food by the road side and buy food without paying. (Sometimes.). They scare the bus passengers with their jumping on the bus, removing the bus chairs to ensure they get paid, jumping off the moving bus, running after the bus in motion, and all the crazy stunts they pull. When they get injured in the process (this is quite common as you see most of them have souvenirs on their faces to show for their "adventures"), they just shrug it off and move on.
Its a life of hustle (pronounced hozzu) and they are proud to be able to hustle along. I do not know if they give a thought to a better life for themselves, but i really wish they would....Life is not meant to be so hard...or though.
I am getting so mushy...but I just learnt of the passing of a rich man who built an empire...He was a founding father and until his death was the MD/CEO of Guaranty Trust Bank, yes, Tayo Aderinokun, fondly called Uncle T by his GTB staff. Uncle T has moved on to glory now, he was a hard worker, a father, friend to many, and of course, a rich man. But where did that all go? It doesn't change the fact that he is dead. Even if they bury him with everything he amassed, he will never be able to use it again. All these things are only useful on earth.
Alas, I deviate...
My main point...every day is a gift, use it wisely...Live your life in a way that when you have the privilege to look back, you will not regret any single action you have taken or regret any word you have uttered.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Geck-mare!!

I killed a gecko today.
I naturally hate thing that creep and crawl. I hate it when they get into my house. Un-invited.
I was going into the kitchen to get a snack. That was when I saw it, balancing on my wall like it owned the place. I took a step forward and it moved in sync. I was upset.

I waited for a bit, and the "idiat" also waited, playing a game with me. So I went to the kitchen and picked up a broom. I was scared and bold at the same time. Scared that it would jump at me, bold that I could kill it. I also took a can of insecticide. 
I was so battle ready and glad that no one was in to watch my drama.
I sprayed it first with insecticide and it promptly fell to the ground. I screamed and jumped back, then started using my broom to attack. 
It climbed back on the wall, and I tried to hit it forcefully, in the process, I grazed the knuckle of my index finger. That didn't stop me for a second. I hit it again and chopped off the tail.
It climbed back up and I hit it again. Using all the fury I could muster and muttering to myself "you had better die, because I wont give up until you do so".
Finally, I dealt the death blow, and I was extremely satisfied. I gathered the remains and flushed it then examined my hands. I couldn't believe that I had gotten injured in the process, and it was so painful too.
I cleaned up my finger and went to bed, my snack forgotten.
Before I knew it, I was awakened by someone calling my name. I woke up and saw the gecko that  I thought I killed. I was so afraid. I looked up and saw several others making their way towards me.  All of them had one mishap or the other, broken tails, dismembered bodies, you name it. I started to cry out in fear, but the one that called my name laughed at me, telling me that it was futile.
I shivered and asked God to deliver me as the geckos started getting on my bed, telling me the circumstances surrounding their death and who was responsible - me
They started to climb on me... I screamed!
I woke up to the wails my nephew who had crawled to my room to play with me. Apparently, he it was that was touching my body and using it as a testing ground for his toy car!
I tried to console him as shivers ran down my spine...what a horrible dream!
I looked up, and saw a gecko...I though it winked at me..